Like a spluttering car, things aren't going smoothly.
I finally finished the latest Irvine Welsh book "Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs" and I was left distinctly underwhelmed by the previously great author.
The winners of the Carling Cup in 2004 thought that for 2006 they would do something different and got knocked out at home to Notts County of the 3rd Division. Say what you like about Maclaren but we were never "giant killed" under him.
Also, my wonderful show "Battle of the Geeks" (see below) is up in the air because the host is in hospital in a serious but stable condition after crashing a rocket car during filming for "Top Gear".
Sometimes when your becalmed the best thing to do is to paddle furiously in a given direction. Sometimes it's to dangle your feet over the edge of the boat with a fishing line attached to your toe. Other times you sit and fret, not knowing what to do.
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