Did anybody see this on ITV-1 on Sunday night? I watched it last night and was struck by a few things.1) When it was filmed, he was at the height of his notoriety from celebrity jungle w@nkshaft so making a show about him sounded like a good idea at the time.
2) Now it is actually out, everybody is wondering who the hell he is again, with good reason, because apart from being married to Liza Minelli, there is no backstory for him.
3) The show itself is completely disingenuous. By setting him up as some kind of celebrity, it filmed him attending various photo-shoots dressed as a pearly king and a polo-player. What the show didn't tell you was that these were to promote the very show he is filming!!! Even at the "soul show" he was promoting, he had to rope in his mates from the jungle show to announce him and add some "credibility" to the whole enterprise.
I'll say that again. He had to bring in people from "I'm a celebrity" in the jungle to add credibility.
4) The smell of bitter desperation hangs around him and the show like stale fish. Being a very minor celeb, famous but not famous enough, well off but nowhere near rich enough, must be some kind of circle of hell if this is anything to go by. It's like a real-life version of Extras.
When he went to the premier of "Dreamgirls" with a backing singer he pestered for a date. I don't think she realised it was a date. When they got there, he signed some extremely unflattering photographs of himself, and then he left her in the lurch, ran over to Beyonce to say hi, came back, asked the film crew if they got it then dragged this poor bemused woman into the film. When he kissed her afterwards The look on her face was akin to an antelope being bitten by a crocodile in a nature film.
5) As to his previous marriage which was glossed over and the only reason why anybody would watch this hagiography for a nobody, my astute wife nailed it - "If I was married to him, I'd beat his puny ass too".
6) I haven't even started on the size and number of pill bottles in the bathroom and the fact that his stylist uses mascara to paint over his bald spot.
I watched expecting a car crash but halfway through realised that it's not even that. It's the moribund life of a not-very-famous-in-the-first-place man desperately trying to eke out some kind of reward and meaning from the fag end of a spectacular un-career.
The only thing sadder than him (and possibly me for watching) are the people who are genuinely entertained by this kind of thing. And maybe that's the biggest mystery of all.
